To whom it may concern,

The Unequal Distribution of Sweet Colours in “Frosties”

I am writing to you to bring to your attention a gross oversight in your packing of your sweets “Frosties.” Today I went down to my local newsagents, Maynews, in Whitby Town Centre, and decided to buy a pack of your hard-boiled, sugar coated sweets to satisfy my sugary craving. I purchased the green and orange packet of these sweets, along with a “Bruiser” bar.
So I am sure you can only imagine my horror as I opened this pack and discovered that they were not all green at all, merely the less than satisfactory purple ones for the majority of the packet. I do admit that this may have been a misunderstanding on my part, and it was meant to be a mixed packet, and I accept this, however, as I opened the rest of the packet, I discovered two different coloured sweets, one orange and one yellow.
To my disgust I realised that this was your attempt at a mixed pack, and I was suitably appalled at your lack of distribution skills. Out of the ten sweets in the packet, eight of them were purple, followed by one orange and one yellow. This is shocking, to be frank.
I understand the need to be more politically correct nowadays, which is why you haven’t eliminated the purple sweet entirely from the packs, but I do think you are now swinging too far in the opposite direction, and this packet was merely an embodiment of political correctness gone mad.
You could ask any consumer as to the least popular colour in your packs, and I am sure you will discover that purple is the winner in that category, hands down. The orange and yellow, however, are clearly the most popular.
So I do believe that if you had conducted your market research to the standard that was obviously required, and then used the information gained from this in the distribution of colours throughout the pack, this appalling event would never have happened.
Also, when I decided to write to you about this, had it not been for the Bruiser bar, I would not have been able to get an address for you from the sweets at all, as your packaging for the Frosties is as any other tube of sweets, where you tear the paper down as you eat the sweets.
So imagine my revulsion as I read that I had to enclose the complete packaging of the sweets. This is an absurd idea, as I have obviously destroyed the packaging in an attempt to get to the sugary sweets inside. However, despite this hurdle you have so carelessly left in my way, I have enclosed the complete packaging as instructed, and I am sure that you will be able to reassemble it, given the correct time and skills needed.
I do hope that such an awful situation will never happen again.



Yours Faithfully





Miss Emma Needler